Speaking to a group of people who don’t have to listen to you is a privilege I don’t take lightly. As a celebrant, it’s a daily honour, and it comes with an immense responsibility every time I pick up that microphone. Whether you’re a seasoned pro or just starting out, my hope is that every celebrant learns how to be a powerful speaker and a meaningful communicator—a rockstar at the wedding.

But let’s get one thing straight: The world doesn’t need celebrants who crave the celebrity spotlight.

We’re not talking about the fame/infamy that comes with being a really high performing celebrant like those who can command an audience and hold their attention and shape the atmosphere of the moment.

A true rockstar celebrant doesn’t need to be the loudest voice or the biggest personality, but they do need to own that space up the end of the aisle, communicate meaningfully, and create an unforgettable vibe.

These are the pillars of Julian Treasure’s TED talk on how to speak so people want to listen—HAIL for short:

  • H: Honesty – Be clear and straightforward.
  • A: Authenticity – Be yourself.
  • I: Integrity – Be your word.
  • L: Love – Wish people well.

Every time I’ve left a wedding feeling on top of the world, it’s because I’ve nailed these four things. It’s about showing up real, cutting the crap, and delivering something truly meaningful. No gimmicks, no fluff—just you, your values, and the love in the room.

Stay true to yourself. Don’t chase trends or try to replicate someone else’s ceremony just because it seemed cool. That’s not what the couple needs. Each ceremony should be an authentic reflection of their story, not a copy-paste from Pinterest or someone else’s highlight reel.

Words are powerful. They can change a room, the air, the mood. A few well-chosen words can shift the entire experience of a wedding, so choose them, and your celebrant, wisely.

Now, do yourself a favor and watch Julian’s TED talk. It’s 10 minutes that will change how you communicate, not just in ceremonies, but in life.